Guide to the Alien Abduction Festival... for humans

Attention aliens: the extraterrestrial version of the guide is available here.

The official Alien Abduction Festival map... so you don't get lost on your way to being abducted:
(note: the guide is below)

Step 1: Check your calendar/clock. Is it now March 20, 2008? If yes, proceed to step 2. If no:
- before March 20, 2008? If yes, only a few more sleeps till the aliens arrive... add yourself to the official Facebook event page, and tell all your friends.
- after March 20, 2008? Sorry, ET has phoned home and the aliens have temporarily returned to their home planets. Consider adding yourself to the Happy Worker mailing list to be invited to future festivals or other fun events.

Step 2: Yay, the Alien Abduction Festival is here! Bring yourself and any alien-friendly friends down to the Queen & Bathurst area in Toronto, ON. Feel free to bring along any funky crafts to add to your UFO or alien creating experience.

Do:
- be ready to enjoy and embrace strangeness in all its forms
- jump in and create fun wherever you go!
- wear your tin foil hat and other extraterrestrial garb with pride
- support the Queen Street Fire Fund either by depositing earthly forms of currency in appropriately indicated collection jars, and/or by buying buttons and t-shirts
- spread joy and happiness to all humans and aliens you meet
- fill your brain with outer space stats on aliens, UFOs, crop circles and paranormal niffy facts

Do not:
- abduct anyone yourself -- please leave this to either our friendly neighborhood ETs or trained professionals
- use your ray gun or neurilze anyone
- consume an inhuman amount of Romulan Ale

Step 3: Check stomach. Hungry? If so, grab some extraterrestrial eats. If no, go to step 4.

Step 4: Take your pick of any of the alieny events.

Step 5: Repeat Step 4 until official earth time reaches 11 PM.

Step 6: After 11 PM? Perhaps your brain cells are in need of further stimulation... may we suggest an alien nightcap?

Step 7: Sleep well, with visions of happy aliens and their human friends dancing through your head... ZzZzZzzzz :)